Music: Neo-soul theme of cheating and its consequences

D’angelo – Shit, Damn, Motherfucker (1995)

Why are you sleepin’ with my woman?

Why are you sleepin’ with my woman?

This comes as a total surprise

I just can’t believe my eyes

My best friend and my wife

Shit, Damn, Motherfucker

Shit, Damn, Motherfucker

Shit, Damn, Motherfucker

Why the both of u’s buck-balled naked?

Why the both of u’s buck-balled naked?

I’m tellin’ you what’s on my mind

I’m ’bout to go get my nine

And kill both of y’all behind

Shit, Damn, Motherfucker

Shit, Damn, Motherfucker

Shit, Damn, Motherfucker

Why the both of u’s bleeding so much?

Why the both of u’s bleeding so much?

Why the both of u’s bleeding so much?

Why am I wearin’ handcuffs?

Shit, Damn, Motherfucker

Shit, Damn, Motherfucker

Shit, Damn, Motherfucker

Shit, Damn, Motherfucker

These lyrics look too short don’t they? Especially when you get to know it’s a little over 5 minutes in length. D’angelo’s neo-soul style has never been one to be filled with words. As a multi-instrumentalist and his own producer, he lets more than his words tell his story. This song never had a video but the lyrics and how it was sung did justice to it.

As always I love to listen to albums just so I can pick out my favourites whether they be the radio-friendly ones or not. On my first listen to his 1995 Brown Sugar, I took a look at his track list and saw a song called Shit, Damn, Motherfucker and wondered why a song title would consist only of profanity. Giving it the benefit of the doubt I listened and its intro is so cool that I got relaxed. After a minute, the story starts and he asks why? His best friend and his wife. His first reaction is Shit as he is bewildered, next is damn! As the scenario hits home. Lastly is Motherfucker as he realises it’s his best friend and his wife committing the act. He says “I’m telling you what’s on my mind, I’m going to go get my nine, and kill y’alls behind” and shortly after he seems to start coming around to his senses as he ask “Why are both of you’s bleeding so much? Why the both of you’s bleeding so much?” Finally he asks “Why am I wearing handcuffs?” and then the chorus again as he realises the implication of what he has done.


The Roots – Break you off ft Musiq Soulchild (2002)

The hook of this song got me first along with the beat, The Roots and Musiq Soulchild delivered a song from the other perspective. Here the artist, Black Thought of The Roots, is the culprit of this same phenomenon. Its video is self-explanatory. Black Thought and Musiq exchange glances as Black Thought arrives. The lady meets him at the door while Musiq’s date arrives. Musiq and the lady exchange glances after his date goes in which could mean a lot, especially that Black Thought wasn’t the first guy she’s cheated with. The action starts in the laundry room and then proceeds to the bedroom. On the way he sees pictures of her and her boyfriend and has a confused look on his face, but she’s at the door to the room and she turns around and it doesn’t matter anymore. Meanwhile Musiq is doing his own thing with ice, honey and strawberries. The boyfriend arrives and opens the door with his own keys and catches them still in the foreplay phase and then makes his presence known. Black Thought pushes her off himself and stands with his hands raised probably trying to say he didn’t know she was taken and he hadn’t done anything yet while the boyfriend reaches for a drawer. The scene changes to Musiq and his girl’s date being interrupted by a loud sound. The scene then moves to the boyfriend in a motel coming out to cops with his hands raised.

Both songs have the same basic theme of being cheated on and taking a repercussive action. Sometimes this involves either or both of the cheaters being injured or killed. Heard of people bathing their lovers with acid? Stabbing another guy or girl with a knife? Makes you wonder why they’d get so mad over ‘just sex’ right? There’s the ideal and the realistic views to why they would do this.

From an ideal, Christian point of view, sex was made by God to consummate marriage which is meant to last as long as one lives. Of course with this kind of lifelong commitment in mind, one can easy bare their all, physically, emotionally and spiritually without feeling fear or insecure knowing fully well they are committed to one another ONLY. This is not a selfish act as the love God preaches is not a selfish one.

Realistically, people just see sex as a thing and want it for different reasons, mostly aside the initial purpose it was invented for. Sex now can be done for different reasons. Fact is that aspect of exclusivity in a relationship is always there because we were made that way. However far we venture, every once in a while we realise we want someone to call our own who will always be there and we won’t have to share with anyone physically, emotionally or spiritually. You wonder at the spiritual aspect? Ever heard a man accuse a pastor of adultery because the pastor and his wife are more spiritually in tune than they are?


Let’s even consider one of the extremes: The term ‘swinger couple’ sounds ironic doesn’t it? It means we don’t have to be sexually exclusive but then no matter whom we experiment with, we still have to come back to each other because we still are emotionally attached and exclusive. We are a ‘couple’, the element of togetherness; but we are allowed to explore whatever fantasies with whomever we choose, the element of liberty. Some even allow their partner to stray only when they choose whom it’s with.

I bet you are thinking this doesn’t apply to you right? You are not that extreme. But still even those who cheat unrepentantly with multiple partners still get livid at the thought of being cheated on. Still some don’t care as they never commit to anyone so they aren’t allowed to catch feelings but still they live with the mind-set that all boys or girls are cheats and as such they don’t trust anyone enough to settle down, something they secretly naturally desire. But then there is progress as there is now the trend of baby mamas. But even someone like Future who has 3 to 4 baby mamas still wanted to marry Ciara. Makes you wonder doesn’t it?

Why would a man get illogical enough to assault or kill people because he was cheated on? It’s simple, we have a possessive nature and in a moment of madness we just want to share our pain, and if an acid is what one feel it would take to communicate their anguish then they use it because one one’s drowning in pain, it only feel logical. Worst of all your best friend and your wife, they two closest people in your life asides your family who are obligated by blood. The two people whom are closest to you only ‘cos you chose them as they chose you, only ‘cos they were there at your ugliest times and stayed, only ‘cos they see the best in you, only ‘cos you could die for them as you believe they would do the same, only ‘cos the love those 2 people professed that gave you life is actually hate and you wish them death in an instant of rage! Shit, Damn, Motherfucker!


Brown Eyed Honey

A sweet smile to make my day

Sparkling eyes that dare me to dream

Silky touch that reminds me you are real

Words that make me laugh

The simple things…

I believe in you and I believe you can do anything

Success is yours and the best is what you deserve…

No anxiety, just anticipation…

No fear, just faith…

No glum, just great…

The feeling of my ear to your back and hearing your heart beat

Knowing I’m one of the reasons it beats continuously…

Hello, hazel eyes, hazy voice

 Brown Eyed Honey

Brown eyes

Brown sugar, as D’Angelo sings

The sweetest type…

Sweet smell

Intoxicating taste, Oh

Your sweet smell

And intoxicating taste


Taste of your lips

While looking into your eyes, deep


Yes, into the depth of your soul

I want to see your soul

The beauty and the imperfection of it

A fabric of friendship and of love let us knit

To keep us warm at night


Yes, when you set my heart on fire

The fire I need to forge my shining armor


Yes, for my princess at the top of the castle

Nothing or no one good comes easy…